You don’t have to be crazy to be my friend; I’ll train you

A week after being told by my ex “I’m divorcing you,” I couldn’t wait to find out exactly what being divorced looked like. My intuition was telling me that whatever it looked like, it wasn’t going to be a walk in the park. After all, his mistress had been divorced twice and undoubtedly knew the tricks of the trade. The shameless bitch had the unmitigated gall to phone me and announce that she was engaged to my husband. Her brazen action immediately made me afraid of what she could do to me, my family, and my life.

Fortunately, as an Army wife, I had enough sense to get in touch with the closest military installation and the Judge Advocate General’s office. I was in the JAG office the next day as I knew nothing about a military divorce or any other type of divorce for that matter. The tutorial lasted about two hours and when I left his office, my head was swimming with information.

I exceeded the speed limit on my way home as my first call was to an attorney and once again, I was blessed with an appointment for the next day. My next calls were to my friends to say, “You are not going to believe what I’m about to tell you.” Those friends and I were not on a conference call, however telling them that my husband said, “I’m divorcing you” and hung up. I believe they all said, “Oh Shit.”

Having friends to call whenever I wanted to bitch or more importantly wanted to laugh with, was a blessing. I tried my best to not share my feelings, disappointments, and anger with my two kids, although as young professional adults they were very savvy.

To all the ladies who have not experienced the military life, never fear. You can talk to friends who have experienced divorce, or you can use your computer to search attorneys in your area. Even if your friend recommends her attorney, please use the computer to check that attorney out as it might not be the right fit for you. The attorney should offer a free initial consultation, if not, move on.

There are attorneys for every personality, they must all be ethical, they must show compassion, they must listen, and they must demonstrate sound judgement.


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